Notes from the Candy Store

Hello world.

It’s been a whole four weeks, of utter male beauty in sunny South Africa. Though you wouldn’t think it with all the depressed people running around recently.

First and foremost, Congratulations to Spain! For reaching top honours in football history. Thank you for bestowing us with your beauty!
This World cup has been a shocking! First because of all the unlikely teams to have been kicked out so early and second because I enjoyed it so!

Of all the fans, the Mexicans rock the hardest. So I’d like to say to Hector, Alejandro, Fernando, Ricardo and Moises (who is actually from Honduras but it’s all good), that I miss you all terribly!! I had so much fun, and I didn’t even go to a game, which I completely regret! But it was just not in my destiny.

But that did not stop me from spotting the hottest up-and-coming-half-naked-soccer players-that-will-make-lots-of-money-selling-perfume-one-day. Also known as if-I-could-have-four-husbands-this-is-who-they-would-be:

Number 1:

Abdelkader Ghezzal - Algeria

Number 2:

Gerard Piqué - Spain

Number 3:

Kevin Prince - Ghana

Number 4:

Lukas Podolski - Germany

Don't ask me who they play for outside of the world cup. I don't know, don't care. All I know is I'm willing to move to any country they want (**,)