Showing posts with label What if. Show all posts
Showing posts with label What if. Show all posts

Thursday, April 2, 2009

To Muslima or not to Muslima?

That is the question.

I am very shy. It takes me a very long time to get comfortable with people. I mean I have known people for like 10 years and I am still not comfortable with just being me.

Anyway, I’ve been playing around with the idea of doing the whole cyber dating thing seriously with Muslima.com. But what if someone that I know sees me on there? Are they going to say…look at that loser…she cant get anyone to like her she is so pathetic. And yes that is the worse case scenario. But then I ask myself…am I ready to get married? I mean really really ready…to get married? And my instinct is to say hell no and start running.

But there is something greater that is making me want to get married. I want to get married for the right reasons. For my religion and for a partner to share my life with. But getting there is what really irritates me.

There is a big part of me that believes that when God decides its time for me to married, I will meet my husband and we will just get married.

But then I think…the dreaded words… ‘what if’…and that’s where Muslima.com comes in. But can we really meet our partners on the web? I only know of one couple that actually got together and stayed together, but they not married.

To be honest, I have actually gone to cyber dating sites before and made a profile, just to see what I would get. I put a fake picture, but the real info, and obviously the picture is nicer than the truth. So I start talking to the guys that respond, a couple emails here and there, and it takes about two emails before they start being freaks. But Muslima.com is different, its serious stuff, so I would have to put a real photo and my real self. Can I really do that? Maybe I’m just a big scary cat ;( maybe I should just do it. What do you think?

Say I do it…then what?