Tuesday, June 21, 2011

"You wanna sow oats? Become a Farmer"

I’ve been blaming fairy tales for a while now.

They make us believe that a Prince will soon come and save us. That happily ever after is possible. And that if we are good we are beautiful. This essentially becomes the foundation of our love lives or lack thereof. And ultimately one of the biggest disappointments in a girl’s life.

But then I thought, wait a minute. Where are the boys in this? Were they not in the same class as us in primary school? Did they not listen to the same stories that we did?
They were there, when the evil witch tried to destroy the beautiful young princess, and when the prince rode on his white horse and saved the princess...the boys participated in the collective sigh at the end of the story.

So my question is...where the hell did men get the whole afraid of commitment thing???
Essentially, men and women both learn the same things when they are young. You have to grow up, get a nice job, don’t make or come home pregnant and then you can get married, have children and live happily ever after. And more so for a Muslim Man.

As Muslims we are taught that getting married completes half of your faith...the other half, well that’s in your hands.

And yet today guys are like ‘I don’t want to get married and I don’t want to get tied down’....I’m like WTF??? Where the hell did you get that from??? Nothing about your upbringing, both in ‘western knowledge’ or religious teachings ever told you anything about ‘playing the field’ or ‘sowing your oats’. You wanna sow oats? Become a farmer.

Everything about the human condition, the nature of who we truly are, is embedded in our ability to connect with each other. The anti-social people have their own special place. It’s called a mental institution and there is a reason for that. If we cannot connect, we die. Literally. New born baby’s without human contact die, no matter how healthy they are.

But the other side of this coin is that some people take this need for connection to an extreme. So they try connecting to lots of people, because the more they connect, the more they crave the connection. And it doesn’t live up to their expectations so they think the next connection is going to be better and it isn’t.

I would like to meet a real life, Samantha Jones that is happy with her life, who she is and her choices and all of this before she watched or knew about Sex and the City. Because let’s face it, people see things on TV and think they can do it in real life. There should have been a warning: please don’t try this at home, before Sex and The City started.

People....let us remember one thing....Samantha Jones is a FICTIONAL CHARACTER. In other words she does not exist. Maybe parts of her are based on a real person, but parts does not a real person make. Okay that sounded better than it looks, but anyway the point is that she is not real. Neither is Carrie or any of the other girls. And it makes me really wonder when people name fictional characters as their hero. *shaking head*

As for the whole 'men can just zip up and walk out' this is false. I know men, who cheated on their wives for years and they are as empty as any women in their position. Maybe it takes longer for the emotions to kick in for men than women...but the Lord sees all. And the day will come, when that belt that they've been making notches on, is used to hang themselves. Because they end up feeling empty and alone just like the women.

I think we should stop looking at how different men and women are and start realising that we are more alike than we are different. Because we are all human, we all need the same things to survive. Maybe we just don’t get it in the same way.

If there is a high divorce rate, it means one thing. There is a higher marriage rate. More people are getting married than getting divorced. Which means as much as men sit on their ‘I don’t want to get married' horse. What they don’t realise is that, that horse is white. And as much as women are waiting to be saved, they are waiting to save them.


Azra said...

Bravo, is all I have to say.

faizel boorany said...

! ~ well said.

Lady T said...

thanks :)

desert demons said...

lolol I enjoyed reading this one - I guess inthe end it isn't as much about the opposite sex as it is about how every person comes with their own set of issues. As for fairy tales - howcome they're never about brown and black girls?

Lady T said...

It really grates me when men and women are made out to have different needs as if we are different species.
I've wondered why us brownies are not represented in the fairy tale genre. The only one we have is Aladdin, and that one makes no reference to her beauty. Or her beauty is not a factor in the story. Is it because brownies are not as important as the white princesses? Or maybe because if we had to have a brown/black Cinderella...her ever after would be cooking in the kitchen *chuckle to myself* I have no idea.

neon said...

I like it. and hey. you forget about a little miss whats her name. LOL hmmmm Princess and the frog. she is a Dark Skinned chick. But hey trinity. I vote you right a book and make a movie about it. Because as much as i love to read your posts. you know i prefer the MOvie. LOL

Lady T said...

Thanks Neon but Princess and the Frog is only black in the newly released Disney movie. In the real story she is white, so it don't really count.
And truth be told, I prefer movies as well :)